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Vol 19|No 3| January|2023



If it makes you happy
Then why the hell are you so sad?

 by Jamie McKenzie
(about author)
What is happiness?

What makes me happy? makes me sad?
If it makes you happy
Then why the hell are you so sad?

Hear Sheryl Crow sing this song here.
What is boredom? depression? sadness?

How do we create a life that is perpetually satisfying and engaging?

Can we avoid periods of despair and gloom?

Essential questions, these!


© iStock

The downside of triumph

Watching a documentary about Sherly Crow's astonishing and wonderful career recently, I was struck by her lifelong struggle with depression. How is it that so many talented people whose careers have brought them great praise and success must wrestle with debilitating bouts of depression?

It turns out that the achievement of a lofty goal is often followed by a period of emptiness and disillusion, as the striving toward the goal was exhilarating while the pause following success is accompanied by a deafening silence.
  • What now?
  • How do I follow this triumph?
  • How do I regain the wonderful feelings that I experienced while striving toward my goal?
  • How can I follow triumph with contentment?
  • Am I addicted to achievement and spectacular performance -- “The Smell of Greasepaint - The Roar of the Crowd?”
Is happiness and contentment quite different from the exalted emotions experienced while performing at spectacular levels?

Finding contentment

Feeling good about one's day-to-day existence -- finding contentment -- is a different kind of happiness than what comes from thrilling adventures and high levels of performance.
"He found contentment in living a basic life." -- contentedness, content, satisfaction, fulfillment; happiness, pleasure, cheerfulness, gladness, gratification; ease, comfort, restfulness, well-being, peace, equanimity, serenity, tranquility, placidity, placidness, repletion, complacency
Source: the Apple Dictionary
Easier said than done?



For those who have experienced the highs of extraordinary performance and success, it may be a puzzling challenge to find peace when offstage.

Serenity and tranquility are fundamentally different from the exultation that might accompany success.
exhilaration, joy, joyousness, delight, glee; excitement, animation, jubilation, exultation, ecstasy, euphoria, bliss, rapture, rhapsody, rhapsodies, transport(s), cloud nine, heaven, paradise, seventh heaven
Source: the Apple Dictionary
Performance seems to bring with it a degree of risk, as I explored in this song -- Bareback Rider:
Bareback rider
Center ring of the circus
Spotlight upon you
As you circle round and round
As you circle round and round

Bareback rider
All eyes are upon you
All fears are behind you
As you stand up straight and tall
As you cartwheel but never fall

Bareback rider
How long can you stay there?
How long can you play there?
In the center of the ring
When it does’t mean a thing?

Bareback rider
With your blades all a whirling
Through the air you’re a twirling
If you drop them, dance away
There’s a price you mustn’t pay

Bareback rider
I come to your circus
I come here to watch you
As you circle round and round
And you never touch the ground
But you circle round and round
Round and round
For a video of me singing this song go to YouTube

Is the price of bliss and rapture a hangover mix of melancholy and distress?

Might performance improve when the artist or performer learns to "center" his or herself? The Center for Natural Wellbeing suggests ways to add this calming state of mind to one's life along with some products to help with the process here
When practiced on a daily basis, centering techniques have far-reaching benefits. Becoming centered relieves stress in the moment and makes you a calmer person in the long run. Stressful events don’t get the better of you, nor do they send you spiraling out of control. Instead, centered people are more likely to go with the flow and accept whatever outcome they get.

Becoming centered can make you a happier person. Centering techniques instruct you on how to let go of worry, fear, anger and sadness. Any time you experience negative emotions is the perfect opportunity to replace them with positive ones. Centered people are able to turn around a bad day, filling it with productivity, accomplishments and happy memories.
Sheryl Crow sings that she's "gonna soak up the sun." Listen on YouTube.
I'm gonna soak up the sun
I'm gonna tell everyone to lighten up
What a good idea!

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